Here's a picture of my newborn self with my Mom and two sisters. Mom looks tired and pale, but she looks happy. And I think this might be the one and only picture where my sisters look pleased that I exist. I would also like to add there there were two photos taken from this sitting. In the other photo, I was completely cross-eyed. A sign of my budding personality, I think.
As a little one, thinking about what I wanted to be when I grew up, I'd often ask my parents the same question. My Dad would say that he wanted to be a pilot. The first time he told me, I heard it as "pirate". I was understandably disappointed. When I asked my Mom, she would say without hesitation that she wanted to be a Mom. That was her dream job.
And here I sit on bed rest at nearly 36 weeks pregnant. I could have this baby boy at any time now. That idea fills me with a random collection of emotions that I have a hard time describing. The decision to become a Mom was not an easy one for me, and it took me a while to get there. Sometimes I wish I was entering into this new career without hesitation and with the certainty that my Mom had. I wish that I could talk to her about becoming a Mom.
But, then I think most of her wisdom she's already passed on by example. I've had about 30 years to observe an expert - I need to work on having some faith that Mom has already instilled in me the things I need to know to become a good Mom.
However, there are two things I know for certain: I'm looking forward to joining the Mom Club, and I can't wait to meet this little guy.
